I am so over the years of fighting and not being able to speak my mind. Tired of being told what to do, having no say, no decision. Tired of being told to shut up or stop running my fucking mouth. What the fuck is the problem, if you dont like it let me leave. Throw me the fuck out. I bite my tongue so hard I draw blood. I glance wrong and I get ripped to shreds.Why am I here? All he wants to do is cripple me to the breaking point. It isnt far off. I am so over being treated like this. Everything turned into my fault, my perception, my attitude, my moods. Most days I am in trouble before the door opens, before I open my eyes to wake, my mouth to speak.

Yes, I will treat others well, as well as I am treated..Communication is broken, words are twisted, looks are hateful. Sick of being sick, being treated like I am lazy, worthless, useless. I cant win if I try to do anything its wrong, if I do nothing its wrong.

This is my life, I made my bed, I took on the responsibility..so..I am supposed to just shut the fuck up and live it out. I am not gonna make it. I know it like it is promised. The decision becomes clearer every fucking day.