So tired of being tired. SO sick of being sick. Tired of feeling alone. I cannot accept this is the way I will live. Once again woke to dreams of past that I dont know how to let go of. I have tried so hard. It wont leave, I would have to cut out my heart to remove this from me. I thought today would be one where I accomplish a few things since I am trapped with no vehicle for a few days.

I saw hope when I saw life that I thought had been taken, I went to see, and yes..this little tortured creature, alive and well..in the same moment of joy I tore open the back heel of my foot below the tendon. The door came slamming in on me and my foot didnt move fast enough. A 3 inch upside down u that is a flap of bruised bloody skin. The pain..intense. I screamed, cried..I cant deal. I cant just be fucking normal about injury when my life is a struggle to begin with. I soaked it in tears, I changed water and soaked again, blood flowed..

Its wrapped and elevated. All the things I wanted to do today are put off until….

 

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